Self validating emotions

To validate someone's feelings is first to accept someone's feelings - and then to understand them - and finally to nurture them. Invalidation, on the other hand, is to reject, ignore, or judge. Let's say one family member has very high validation needs, or one member is invalidating, or both have high validation needs, or both are invalidating?Often, unidentified or unrecognized and invalidated feelings are at the heart of relationship issues and problems.I believed that I had wonderful, hard working parents who did their best for me. I had no frame of reference for any other way of life. I had to validate the pain that being devalued, dismissed and treated as “not quite valid” as a person had an effect on me. I dissociated (hence the term “dissociative identity disorder) and dissociating enabled me to cope.(Regarding Dissociative Identity Disorder and Multiple Personality Disorder ~ not everyone who has dissociative identity disorder or dissociative issues, fragments into alter personalities.

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In primitive societies and among animals, facial expressions communicate messages without words.

Research shows that in all cultures, the same facial expressions are linked to the same basic emotions.

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You do not need to use all these techniques in order to validate; instead, choose one or two that feel natural and fitting in a given situation.

Often, if we are experiencing a communication breakdown, or if there is a wall between us and someone else, it most likely has been built with the bricks of invalidation. Mastering it will greatly elevate your emotional intelligence and your of validation to feel good about themselves.

Both verbal and nonverbal forms of emotional expressions have an automatic effect on others.

For example, an infant reacts spontaneously to an adult’s smile or look of fright.

The Function of Emotions Understanding the function of emotions and help you understand why you do what you do.

Intense emotions communicate to others and motivate behavior.

The latter is particularly true of people experiencing difficult times or a loss and of people who are highly sensitive, insecure, have low self esteem or who are easily intimidated.

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